Imagewhat’re you supposed to do if somebody close to you is just…..bad luck? like those people who are always going through it. family, school, money problems…is it karma? or fate? for some reason i feel like i have some kind of responsibility to maintain some peoples happiness. i would hate to add to somebody’s demise…….. but i’m pretty paranoid that i’ll eventually be sucked into this black hole of unfortunate events! like i wanna help, but a majority of everything happening is out of my hands and im almost always just the person that has to soften the blow. i dont like having this responsibility..its scary and can be too much sometimes. but its not like i can leave a pal hanging? somebody you care for so much….. but at the same time its like grow the fuck up! aren’t you supposed to be in charge of your own happiness? it doesnt help that EVERYONE has to be involved. im chained to a dead weight and im this close to cutting my foot off! i feel bad and im scared to think about what would happen if i left..probably nothing too terrible but im always paranoid and putting myself in situations. but maaaan some people really are just living that bozo life and i dont even know how that even comes about? im not even just talking about one person now. some people really just fuck with the bottom of the barrel type of shit. im not a priss or anything but i dont mind enjoying the nicer things in life..i think i know my potential and that i dont need to associate myself with such gloomy people… 

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