expectations are a waste of energy. all they do is create fantastic scenarios in your mind but once everything is over and done with you’re more likely to be shortchanged. at least, thats whats been happening to me lately.
i woke up feeling different today. the past few days i think ive just been getting fed up with my woes and i just snapped into it. i dont want you anymore. and it feels okay.
but its like, man i spent a big chunk of my life really tripping. i dont regret any of it, but it took one small conversation for me to sorta slap myself out of this daze.
in terms of my other situation, i hope i havent lost a best friend. i still dont know how i feel, right now i DO feel really really horrible for not keeping everything 100. i feel like im a really shitty girlfriend. no one deserves that kind of treatment.. especially for a first serious one. my boyfriend really went out of his way to take care of me. i think our relationship turned into something mushy, but i think its just cuz were different people. its too early to say how things will turn out, but i like this idea of taking a break from every one.